Heaven by Alexandra Adornetto

Bethany and Xavier do the unthinkable. 

Having been to Hell and back, Bethany and Xavier can no longer bear being torn apart by inhuman forces. They marry, making their true love official and defying the laws of Heaven by sealing their mortal-celestial affair. As a result, Heaven brings forth the wrath of the Sevens, power-hungry angels who would stop at nothing to bring Bethany back home. 

Forced to blend in among other teenagers and conceal their identities, Bethany and Xavier enter college and pretend to be siblings. But the forces of Hell are at work, and danger lurks at every corner, threatening the love that Bethany and Xavier have fought so hard for.

What I liked about the book:

NOTHING.

Seriously. I can't even name one freakin' thing. 

I don't want to be so mean, but seriously. This book is an ABOMINATION. There's nothing to even like about in this book. It's a fail and even the cover killed me with its cheesiness. UGH.  

I'd go on ranting about how stupid this franchise is, but I decided that I'd just enumerate the things I abhorred while reading it. 

1. BETHANY AND XAVIER

-I have no idea if they're plain stupid or if Adornetto just made them ignorant on purpose. They marry and right after the Reaper comes and kills Father Mel, the priest who presided over their union. When Xavier starts feeling guilty that Bethany protected her from the Reaper and Father Mel died, Bethany tells them that it wasn't their fault when CLEARLY, it was. 

First, if Bethany had the nerve to fight the Reaper from getting Father Mel's soul, then Father Mel wouldn't have died. 

Second, if BETHANY AND XAVIER DIDN'T MARRY AND SCREW AROUND AND LISTENED TO THE WARNING OF THE RUMBLING EARTH WHEN XAVIER PROPOSED THEN MAYBE THINGS WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN AS BAD AS IT TURNED OUT TO BE. 

OH GOD. I FORGOT. THEY WEREN'T THINKING. 

THEY JUST BASED THEIR DECISION ON THEIR IMPULSE, AND LET ME TELL YOU, THAT'S NOT HOW THINGS WORK. 

*facepalm*

Bethany is just so STUPID. If I were to queen a character for her stupidity, then I'd definitely place the crown on her pea-sized head. Her stupidity is contagious that it makes her fellow characters stupid and affects them, causing the wings of an angel and the misery of a teenage boy. SHE SUCKS. Period. She even describes her first sex with Xavier as an UNDERWATER WORLD. AN UNDERWATER WORLD. A FUCKING UNDERWATER WORLD. 

SO YOU'RE A MERMAID NOW?

GOD.

(More on that later.)

2. The cheesy cliché 'boy has special powers that makes him special like girl' 

I should've warned you guys that this was a spoiler-filled review,  but I guess it's fine because I didn't want you guys to read it anyway and waste your precious time like I did. Ha! 

So, to make everything 'EQUAL', Xavier has powers too. Yay! *fake cheers* He's an abomination of divine intervention by Ivy which doesn't do him any good especially when it comes to his insolence. 

3. The writing

SERIOUSLY, ADORNETTO.

I used to forgive you for all your purple proses and enjoyed in how you lushly described your characters, but now you've gone way too far. 

Nuh-uh-uh. *wags finger* 

AN UNDERWATER WORLD? SERIOUSLY. 

AND HOW DO YOU SUPPOSE I COULD JUST PICTURE MY FIRST SEX LIKE THAT? 

AND THEY CLAIMED THAT YOU KNEW HOW TEEN HEARTS BEAT. 

*slow clap*

MY GOD. I WANT TO DROWN YOU IN THAT UNDERWATER WORLD AND WATCH YOU FORGET HOW TO BREATHE. 

And oh, wasn't it mentioned in the first book that having a mortal can get permanently scarred in the soul when he or she has sexual intercourse with an angel? 

UGH. Tsk, tsk. Inconsistencies. 

Anyway, Alexandra Adornetto is an excessive user of figures of speech in which she makes use of them in order for her sentences to sound utterly wrong. This leaves me wondering how she climbed her way towards the New York Times Bestselling list. I mean, this book is too shallow for Chrisaake! Her plot sucks. Her writing sucks. How did the publishers even pick up this book? Are they that desperate? I'm sure a lot of undiscovered writers out there could do better than her preachy good-for-nothing novel. Ughhhh. She needs to be exterminated!! 

4. The cover 

A HEART? 

SERIOUSLY? 

THAT'S SO CHEESY AND PUKE-WORTHY.

*grabs a bucket, pukes what I ate for breakfast* 

OH GOD I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING. 

IT'S SO CHEEEESYYYYYYY 

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAJAHAJHA

SOMEONE  STOP ME FROM LAUGHING AT IT

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

5. The ending

The series was an entire flop. It's full of bigotry, double standards, cheesy romance and impulsive inconsistencies that will push you to the edge of your wits. The ending didn't make much impact at all. By the time I flipped the last page, I exhaled a sigh of relief that FINALLY the ordeal was done and Bethany's stupidity wouldn't bother me anymore. The entire story is too idealistic, and the ending was, of course, sappily happy. It's a book you could easily forget (and you could choose to forget), and it's such a shame that Feiwell and Friends wasted their precious resources on this one, not to mention the trees that lost their lives in the printing of this hideous trilogy. I feel sorry for everyone who's read this, myself included, and I wish I hadn't come across the first book on that wonderful book sale. 

Describe the book in one word: HELL

Favorite characters: No one, really. Except the dog. 

Any annoying characters?

Oh. Let me think. BETHANY. 

Favorite quote: 

Nothing really stuck to me as this finalé was too boring and too sappy. 

Rating: 0 out of 5 cupcakes 

Is it worth your money?

*huffs* Obviously... 

Is it worth your time? 

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

NO.

Recommended for: 

>Shallow readers. Readers who enjoy reading predictable plots and annoying heroines. 

>Bigots. Racists. Teenage girls who hate on their fellow girls who steal their guys. 

>No one, really. 

MASTERPIECE

I was an ordinary slab of rock—hardened and aged—with jagged ends and uneven features. I was flawed and nothing special, nothing but a mere testament to the cycles of nature and a witness to the conspiracies of the universe. 

Until his hands found me. 

His fingers gently treaded along my surface as if I were something that would not wound him, as if my edges were not sharp enough to pierce his skin and let him bleed. The warmth of his fingertips seeped beneath the coldness of my skin, and I felt an inner glow pulsate through my hollows and fill them. He held me like I was a piece of metal and not a slab of rock. To him I was as strong as steel and as rare as platinum. In his eyes I was as precious as gold and as valuable as silver. 

So I let him mold me. 

I let his hands memorize where I ended and I began. I let him shape my coarse edges into graceful contours and subtle arches. When his chisel's pointed edge chipped me too hard, he would murmur soothing words to what others would view as inanimate, and when his tools left marks on my skin, he would tell me the tale of Pygmalion and Galatea and how sculptor fell in love with his work and I would listen to his comforting voice all day as if it were a salve to numb the pain. All the while he was working, sweat gathered upon his brow and concentration masked on his face. He carved intricate details on my surface, and all the while I told myself that I was nothing special, nothing more than rock, nothing more than a torn and twisted chunk of Earth. 

Until he made me beautiful. 

Until I saw the look in his eyes that reflected one word. 

Masterpiece. 

And he loved me. 

He loved me for the rivulets of curls cascading down the curve of my back, for the fullness of my ivory bosom and for the slight arch on the spot above my navel. He loved me for my slender fingers, for my rounded hips and my carefully gilded limbs. He loved me for the fine line of my jaw, for the bridge of my nose and for the hollow of my cheeks. He loved me for the unearthly expression I wore, for the spark in my eyes and for the shape of my lips. 

He loved me for who I am, and I loved him back. 

And I was happy. 

I watched his eyes light up, two pools of burning stardust gazing at the deep recesses of my soul. I felt his lips graze my cheek and hover on the spot above my lips till his mouth meets mine and I feel so, so alive. I listened to his witty anecdotes, to his romantic ballads and snippets of poetry. I watched him rise to the heavens and soar with his dreams, and I prayed with my closed lips that he never falls. 

And he never did. 

He took me with him, parading me and telling the whole world how much he loved me. I felt extraordinary bliss, and the world was a beautiful kaleidoscope of colors that grew brighter and brighter with each passing day.  I felt as if it would never end, as if we were to last forever and surpass what lies beyond the infinity. 

But I was wrong. 

As the days passed, he grew restless, and his eyes glowed with a different light that reflected the inferno wrestling with his soul. His lips no longer spoke of my praises nor peppered my skin with kisses. Rather, he spoke of how I was too old-fashioned, too bland and too lackluster.His stories were long gone and replaced with cusses, with wails of misery and cries of pain, and when he looked at me, I knew that he no longer loved me, and I was crushed though fully intact.

He said that it would never end.

I thought it would never end.

But I was wrong. 

I watched him roll on his downward slope of dreams and wept silently for his pain. I listened to him compare me with other sculptures, and I took it all in, wanting to drive his chisel deep down my heart and end this wicked torture. I watched him fall from the heavens and land on his back, unable to get up from the madness twisting and turning his very soul. 

 Until another slab of marble came, and his hands were put to good use. 

With the same tools he used to make me, he sculpted her and made her far more beautiful than I was. He adorned her hair with pearls and seashells and carved a cloth that flowed from her shoulder to her hip. Her eyes held a luminous celestial sparkle, and her lips were curved into a perpetual smile that was meant to entice the hearts of men. Her figure was of perfect proportions, and her skin was flawless and unmarked—a manifest of how he took his time to create his new Galatea. 

I watched him bring his ideas to life. I watched the look of satisfaction cross his face, and I was moved by how he looked so happy and so beautiful. I watched the same sweat gather on his brow and transform his face into a mask of pure concentration. I watched him reclaim his dreams and begin believing again in between lines of poetry and the story of the sculptor who fell in love with his work.  I captured his face in my mind and memorized its angles, so that when he finally forgot me, I would have something to remember him by. 

And when he was finished his new art I saw the same look in his eyes that reflected one word. 

Masterpiece. 

Hades by Alexandra Adornetto

Bethany and Xavier's love has withstood the forces of evil, but it can't keep Bethany from getting tricked into a motorcycle ride to Hades, the inferno that is every angel's worst nightmare. 

Imprisoned in the midst of lavish hotels with friendly demons and nightclubs with souls condemned to dance perpetually, Bethany finds herself in the hands of Jake Thorn, the very same demon that threatened her relationship with Xavier. During her stay in Hades, Bethany discovers that Jake now wants her more than ever as queen of the Underworld, and as the lives of Bethany's loved ones become jeopardized in their rescue mission, Bethany is forced to strike a deal with the devil, making the ultimate sacrifice that can destroy her and the ones she loves. 

What I liked about the book: 

1. THE DISTANCE BETWEEN BETHANY AND XAVIER

SERIOUSLY. 

I think it's the best thing ever about the book. 

Xavier and Bethany are a couple Gorilla-glued together, and when Bethany is whisked away in a motorcycle by Jake... BAM!!! The two are now separated by Hell and are not cuddling and holding each other every single second in this ordeal of a book. For once in actual angel book setting, I actually agree with the bad character. 

This distance omitted most of the cheesy lines I endured in the previous book (although Beth uses the same flowery language normal teenagers and angels wouldn't), and I could tell that being apart from Xavier and being closer to Jake spawned a path of self-discovery for Beth. Her character became more defined and feistier, and her love for Xavier (which is mushy as ever) deepened with the story's predicament. In "Hades", Adornetto presents a Beth who tries to grasp with the concept of sacrifice and eventually learns that it is inevitable in the battlefield of love. 

2. The setting

Again, Alexandra Adornetto never fails to set up a whole new world readers would learn to appreciate. Hell, when people think about it, is automatically associate it with blood, torture, pain, and suffering. We imagine Hell being up in flames and filled with ear-piercing cries from tormented souls and wicked demons. Without disregard to how society views the inferno, Adornetto presents Hell in a more subtle and modern way. Fabricating it with the paradox of a greedy world's emptiness, one's image of Hell will never be the same again. 

3. The cover

As Feinwell and Friends did with the first book, the cover for Adornetto's sequel is as stunning as it can get. Again, it captures the essence of the book's plot, and gives readers a chance to take a peek on the story before even landing on the first page. 

4. ACTION!

There isn't much, but I'm glad Adornetto took out a huge chunk of fluff and replaced it with flashes of motion. I'm also happy to be spared of the high school drama and sappy lines exchange by our couple of the year. It was a good plot development, and I hope this carries on in the final installment. 

What I didn't like about the book: 

1. LUCIFER'S NAME IS BIG DADDY

SERIOUSLY?

BIG DADDY? 

Is that the best ghetto name you can think of, huh? 

In Hades, demons call Lucifer, the so-called brightest star and ringleader of fallen angels and demons, BIG DADDY. 

DO YOU EVEN EXPECT ME TO FEAR THAT NAME LET ALONE TAKE IT SERIOUSLY? 

MY GOD. *facepalms* 

2. Hades

Let me get this straight. I know Adornetto wants a more dramatic terminology for Hell, but Hell and Hades ARE NOT THE SAME. Hell is a place of suffering where the wicked are punished after death while Hades is a mythological figure, the God of the Underworld. Although Hades can be considered as an abode for the dead, the Greek Underworld also contains the most valiant heroes alongside wandering souls and those cast in the pit of Tartarus. They are be subject to different fates in the afterlife, and the concept of Hades does not fully context suffering and pain as what Christian religion implies. It was a bad choice for Adornetto to rename Hell into Hades as a merging of monotheism and polytheism results to nothing but a clash of core beliefs.

3. Bethany's stupidity

Though her character underwent some minor changes, Bethany still hasn't lost the ONE trait she has in common with other whiny YA heroines: STUPIDITY. 

YES. STUPIDITY. 

I MEAN, SHE KNOWS AN OUIJA BOARD IS AN INSTRUMENT OF EVIL FROM WHAT'S SHE TAUGHT BUT SHE STILL GOES AHEAD AND PARTICIPATES IN SOME SILLY HALLOWEEN SEANCE JUST BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T WANT TO BE LABELED A "CHICKEN" OR A "KILLJOY".

THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST BEING LABELED A FREAKIN' KILLJOY. 

OH GOD.

AND ONE MORE THING, WHY DIDN'T SHE JUST GET OFF THE GODDAMN MOTORCYCLE? SHE'S AN ANGEL FOR CHRISSAKE, AND IF EVER SHE GOT HER PRECIOUS GLOWING SKIN DAMAGED SHE HAS A SERAPHIM FOR A SISTER AND SHE CAN CURE HER WITH A SINGLE TOUCH!!! 

OH MY... 

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! 

HOW CAN SHE BE SO SO STUPID AFTER ALL THIS TIME??? OH YEAH, RIGHT. SHE NEEDS TO BE STUPID JUST SO HER DEAR DARLING KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR CAN RESCUE HER!!!!

AND IF SHE REALLY TRUSTED AND KNEW XAVIER THEN SHE WOULDN'T EVEN BELIEVE THAT LIE THAT GOT HER ON THE MOTORCYLE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!

IT JUST SHOWS THAT INSTALUV, DEAR READERS, HAS ITS OWN CONSEQUENCES SUCH AS BEING LOCKED IN HELL AND COMING FACE-TO-FACE WITH BIG DADDY. 

UGH. 

I CAN'T EVEN TAKE HIS NAME SERIOUSLY. 

Oh, and here are more hints of her stupidity from the book: 

MY STUPIDITY. 

 See??? EVEN BETHANY ACKNOWLEDGES HER OWN STUPIDITY. LOOOOOOL. SUCH A PEA BRAIN. 

4. The villain was an epic fail. 

JAKE THORN. 

The name sounds badass and hot, but I end up imagining our resident Prince of Evil like this:

Yes. A bit close to Professor Snape's appearance with his hooked nose drooping slightly. 

AND FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHY DOES HE SOUND SUCH A SPOILED BRAT IN FRONT OF BIG DADDY? I MEAN, COME ON, HE SOUNDS LIKE A LITTLE BOY WHO JUST GOT ROBBED OFF A PIECE OF CANDY. 

UGH.

*facepalms* 

5. What happened to Bethany's new friends from Hell

I'm not spoiling anything, but I really wasn't in favor of how things ended between them and Bethany. I mean, it wasn't really Bethany's fault, BUT SHE COULD'VE AT LEAST TRIED HARDER. 

So, I guess I should wrap it up...

Describe the book in one word: OKAY. 

Favorite characters:

Taylah. 

Not spoiling anything. You guys have to find out for yourselves. 

Any annoying characters? 

Oh the usual. 

Add Molly to it. What she did was TOTALLY embarrassing. Ugh. She's just too damn shallow and rash which is why she appears too easy for guys. 

UGH. 

Favorite quote:

"Never love that which you cannot keep. 

Rating: 2.5 out of 5 cupcakes

Is it worth your money?

Nah.  Read it as PDF. 

Is it worth your time? 

*shrugs* 

Recommended to: 

>Those who have read the series, and like me, are curious enough to wonder what would happen in the end and if Bethany would finally get a brain

> Suckers for a YA romance/angel genre

The Transfer by Veronica Roth

Before he became Dauntless, he was part of Abnegation. 

Before he fell in love with Tris, he only had himself and his father. 

Before he became known as Four, he was Tobias Eaton. 

"The Transfer", one of Veronica Roth's series of short stories told from Four's point of view, revolves around the story of Marcus Eaton's only son, Tobias Eaton. Here we catch a glimpse of Four's old life before Tris and Dauntless—his vulnerabilities, his deepest, darkest secrets and the four fears that has defined him. 

Although only 50 ebook pages long, Veronica Roth doesn't fail to deliver her message directly to the point. She thrusts an icy dagger on our chests and leaves us aching for more once she wrenches it out of our fragile, little hearts.  There is a never a dull moment in Roth's short story. Every page is jumping with action and angst, and the character of Tobias is brought to a broader spectrum. Here he is stripped off his black clothes and replaced with his grey ones. Here he is a young man of contradictions—strong and weak, coward and brave all at the same time. 

Halo by Alexandra Adornetto

Gabriel, Ivy and Bethany Church are three angels sent to Earth on a mission—to redeem the world from the dark forces of evil through works of charity and good examples. Stationed in the cozy coastal town of Venus Cove, the angels adjust to their human forms by blending in with the town's tight-knit community; Ivy lending a helping hand with various advocacies and Gabriel and Bethany entering the school of Bryce Hamilton. 

Bethany, the youngest and most inexperienced of the three, immediately roots herself to the human world as charming schoolboy Xavier Woods captures her attention. As Bethany struggles to learn the language of adolescent girls and academics, she figures that among her siblings, she is by far the most human and the most vulnerable for non-celestial affection. Yearning to become truly part of the world of the boy she has learned to love, Bethany forms a romance with Xavier, and as dark forces threaten the star-crossed lovers, Bethany discovers that the power of love can defy both Heaven and Hell and all who wish to go against it. 

What I liked about the book: 

1. The cover 

Come on, guys. Whoever did this cover from Feiwel and Friends was a GENIUS. The cover encompasses everything you need to know about the book. Moreover, it urges you to purchase it because it would look perfect in your shelf. The sunlight captured between the protagonists sheds light on the idea of divinity and celestial beings, and the silhouettes of Bethany and Xavier appear mysteriously dramatic and accurate at the same time. 

The cover is golden (as its color suggests it), but more than that, it captures the true essence of the book and allows readers not to judge it but to see right through it. It is simple and easy to understand as what its text presents, and its cover has delivered justice to what its story can offer. 

2. The all-too almost realistic setting

Adornetto's experience with studying in various schools has helped her construct a concrete atmosphere for Bryce Hamilton high school. In Bethany's gateway to the human world,  different cliques and personalities are presented through a menagerie of students experiencing good, old high school drama—prom dates, rugby games, wild parties and locker gossip. This set-up, which Adornetto decorates with school memorabilia close to the heart, allows young adult readers to easily identify themselves as part of the book rather than a bystander watching by the sidelines. 

3. Vividness and description

Having written this at an early age, a young woman like Alexandra Adornetto must be commended for her descriptive pen and paper skills. She paints her story with dynamic colors that gifts readers with a clear and beautiful picture of what is happening on each chapter. The words she uses in descriptive sentences are carefully chosen and appropriate for the narrator's voice and the story's setting. Details such as a character's hair or eye color become repetitive as the story progresses, and I find it helpful for readers who do not want to get lost as it provides a true-to-life picture rather than a hazy, unfathomable image. 

4. The angel is a GIRL.

 This is a refreshing take on the YA Angel genre as we are accustomed to protagonist angels being that of the male sex.  It's very interesting that Adornetto decided on twisting things around and allowing us to get inside a female angel's perspective. Aside from drawing the line between the difference of the male and female angel mindset, the book gives us a taste of the different and explores the YA Angel genre at a different angle. 

What I didn't like about the book:

1. It bored the HELL out of me. (pun intended) 

Although Adornetto describes her characters and her setting skillfully, most of the time I found her writing style too wordy and boring. She writes like an 8th grader, and honestly speaking, I can do a whole lot better than that. Her sentences are too simple, and her story is too cliché although as I've said, her choice of words were a good selection. There is poor plot development, and I could not feel my connection with the characters however simple they were. "Halo" is slow-paced and excruciatingly painful, and its ending did nothing to satisfy my tough ordeal. By the time I finished the book, it didn't strike me as remarkable, and I decided that I'd let this sappy love story rot in my shelf. 

2. THE CHARACTERS

Okay. *breathes in deeply, straightens back, breathes again*

Let's start with Bethany. 

AM I THE FIRST PERSON TO FIND HER SO STUPID AND NAIVE? 

I know that you're new on Earth. I get that. But you don't have to emphasize it like a neon sign flashing repeatedly in the dark. If you really want to keep your cover Bethany, you should act more mature and more careful. If you're an angel, Bethany, then maybe you SHOULDN'T BE SO SELFISH ALL THE TIME WONDERING ABOUT YOUR PRETTY BOY. WHY CAN'T GOD EVEN SEND HER BACK??? It's obvious that she's useless and only spending her time on Earth with her one, true love who, by the way, had her at 'hello'. Literally. It was too predictable that he's going to be her love interest. *rolls eyes, grabs fistfuls of hair* Ughhhhh! Because of Xavier, she's forgetting her duties as an angel and ends up doing more harm than good. 

Speaking of Xavier...

WHY IS HE SO PROTECTIVE OF BETHANY AND HAS TO REMIND HER TO EAT OR DRINK A GLASS OF WATER JUST BECAUSE HE PROMISED HER BROTHER TO PROTECT HER? HE EVEN FORCEFULLY FEEDS HER A PROTEIN BAR WITH AIRPLANE SOUNDS AND ALL.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? DOES THAT MEAN THAT US GIRLS CAN'T TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES AND BOYS KNOW BETTER TO SHOULDER OUR RESPONSIBILITIES (EVEN THOSE THAT COME INVOLUNTARILY)? Oh come on, Adornetto, you're every feminist's enemy author now, and YOU, YES YOU have a lot of explaining to do. *grumbles and roars*

*composes herself, fixes hair, grins* 

At one point in the book, Adornetto drops a hint of the suffering Xavier endured before Bethany. I'm not going to let it out here since I'm assuming that not everyone who comes across this blog has read the book, but I would like to point out my disappointment towards the topic not being fully explored by the author. Had it been shed with more light, it would've molded Xavier into something more stronger and human. Adornetto could've used it to her advantage and manipulated readers so that they could feel the same 'head over heels' feeling that Bethany has for Xavier while exposing the vulnerabilities on Bethany's so-called 'other half'. 

3.THE BOOK IS TOO FREAKIN' IDEALISTIC

NO, WE DO NOT LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE A KIND ACT OF CHARITY CAN GO AHEAD AND CONVERT A WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD. NO, WE DO NOT LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE THE GIRL GETS THE GUY OF HER DREAMS DURING THEIR FIRST ENCOUNTER. NO, WE DO NOT LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE IT'S ALL RAINBOWS AND BUTTERFLIES AND UNICORNS. 

NO. JUST NO. 

WE LIVE IN A WORLD OF UPS AND DOWNS. WE LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE LOVE AND FAITH TAKES TIME. WE LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE NOTHING IS PERFECT AS IT SEEMS, AND IT'S ABOUT TIME ALEXANDRA ADORNETTO REALIZES THAT. The setting of her book might've been an utter utopia if you'd ask me, and this is the reason why human beings are often misled in believing in something their hearts cannot still fully grasp. Books like this are the reason why teenage girls assume that their crushes like them back and end up weeping with broken hearts. Books like this are the reason why people do an act of kindness and become repulsive when that act of kindness is not returned in their favor. Books like this are the reason why people prefer to dream and live in fiction rather than face the horrors of reality with sheer will and a clenched fist. 

IT'S ABOUT TIME YA BOOKS DO NOT PRESENT THE IDEAL. 

It's about time that they present severe consequences to one's actions. It's about time that they reveal stories of broken hearts and shattered relationships. It's about time that YA presents something that can both be fictitious and tangible at the same time. 

"Halo" is too predictable. Moreover, we know that the guy would end up with the girl, so why bother with the whole series? It will just bore you and have you facepalming over and over again because of its nasty characters and cliché storyline. 

4. INSTA-LUUUUURVEEEE

AGAIN. ANOTHER GRAVE OFFENSE BY A BOOK I HAD HIGH EXPECTATIONS OF. 

INSTA-FCKING-LOVE

Bethany sees Xavier fishing. Bethany is attracted to him and asks him something. Bethany enrolls in high school and meets Xavier on the first day. Xavier and Bethany feel a spark. They go out on a date. Bethany TRUSTS HIM ALREADY. Xavier and Bethany can't stop thinking about each other. Bethany reveals that she's an angel after knowing Xavier for only A WEEK OR TWO. Bethany questions GOD is now ready to TURN HER BACK on Heaven just because she met this boy whom she barely knows bur claims to entirely know. 

My, my, my. 

Is this how authors perceive adolescent love nowadays??? 

You can't just trust a person completely after going out with him once and knowing him for a week or two. Most of all, you can't reveal your deepest, darkest secret to a person you've barely spent your whole life with. Either Bethany is just SO STUPID or Adornetto wanted things to become fast-paced and failed miserably. 

5. #CLINGY

Bethany and Xavier are rarely apart in the entirety of the book. SERIOUSLY. Beth ALWAYS yearns to be with Xavier, even going against the rules just to see him as if she's never going to see him again. Yeah, yeah, I get the point that she could be gone anytime soon, but doesn't she know that DISTANCE CAN SOMETIMES BE HEALTHY FOR A RELATIONSHIP? 

Oh, wait. I forgot. 

BETHANY KNOWS NOTHING OF LOVE AND ITS THINGAMAJIGS. 

*facepalms*

 Moving on....

I don't get the point in writing a scene where the two main characters just snuggle and DO THEIR HOMEWORK while exchanging cheesy lines. 

MY GOD. 

THEY DIDN'T EVEN FINISH THEIR HOMEWORK BEFORE THEY BEGIN SNOGGING. 

I guess Adornetto ran out of things to write about and decided that homework would be the most entertaining option. 

As if students even find homework pleasurable... Ugh. *rolls eyes* 

6. What is this angelic mission that you speak of? 

GABRIEL is an ARCHANGEL. Ivy is a SERAPHIM. And Bethany... Well, Bethany is NOTHING, but still, WHY VENUS COVE? The sleepy town is beautiful and comfy in itself, yet there are so many places these "powerful" angels could be sent to. They could've gone in a war zone and enlightened people with peace so that they would cease fire and surrender their arms rather than diffuse a fight between two schoolboys who are either high or too drunk to actually think rationally. They could've been deployed in Africa and other third-world countires to help with poverty and hunger rather than spending time as volunteers in soup kitchens and nursing homes. If these angels really were powerful and meant to fight back the forces of evil, then they should be sent somewhere where evil is at its peak and not some mansion located in a town where things seem perfectly normal and relaxing. It's like being in some sort of VACATION rather than being on a so-called 'angelic mission.' UGHHHHHHH. *grabs fistfuls of hair again* 

And another thing, the ENEMY WAS SO OBVIOUS. I'd hate to believe that angels really were this ignorant and naive because if they really existed like this (which I doubt they do), then without a doubt, we would be at Hell's mercy by the time they set foot on Earth. 

7. Can get too preachy at times.

I'm a devout Catholic. Believe me when I say I am. I'm proud to declare my faith and stand up to it, but I guess the mini-sermons and theological lectures just doesn't work for me. This book is classified under 'Young Adult Romance' and not 'Christian Romance'. All the while Adornetto is shoving us with her ideas of marriage before sex and good deeds and acts of compassion along with the premise that God exists and that there is Heaven, Hell, angels and demons. Personally, I think Adornetto is voicing out her opinions through Bethany, and it just doesn't work because not all of her readers are hardcore on their religion or have any religion at all. This is a heinous version of "Christian Capitalism". If Adornetto really wanted things to come out as holy and religious, then why can't she try her luck labeling her books as a 'Christian Romance'? 

Oh right. There's more economy in Young Adult Fiction. Perfect reason. 

Tut, tut. 

8. Lines are TOO CHEESY, TOO MUSHY and TOO SAPPY. 

For example, 

“Did I mention I've finally decided on a nickname for you?"

"I didn't know you were looking."

Well, I've given the matter some serious thought."

"And what have you come up with?"

"Cookie," I anounced proudly.

Xavier scrunched up his face. "No way."

"You don't like it? What about Bumblebee?"

"Worse."

"Snookie-Wookie?"

"Do you have any cyanide?"

"Well, some of us are just a bit hard to please.” 

B*TCH PLEASE. 

Xavier was right. I'd rather take the cyanide. 

Another one:

“Find x if (x)=2sin3x,over the domain -2piX=Beth

'Stop goofing around!',I said.

'I'm not! I'm stating the truth.You're my solution to everything',Xavier replied. 'The end result is always you.X always equals Beth.” 

WHAT?

I'm sure if I was your Math teacher, I would be proving that X WOULD NOT BE EQUAL TO BETH, you LOVEDRUNK BASTARD. And 'x' does not ALWAYS retain the same value in all equations. IT VARIES WHICH MEANS YOUR LOVE VARIES IN VALUE, IDIOT. 

And I thought you were oh so smart and perfect... *pretends to faint*

9. THE ENDING

I'm not spoiling anything, but...

COME ON ALEXANDRA ADORNETTO YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN A CHEESY ENDING THAT'S DRIPPING WITH CHILDISHNESS AND SAPPY STUFF. WE ALREADY KNOW HOW POWERFUL LOVE IS AND ALL THOSE *bleeps because spoilers and strings of curses follow* 

So to sum it all up... 

Describe the book in one word: BLEH. 

Favorite character/s: Gabriel (because he's hot and I have a weakness for blond boys and he thinks rationally FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE)

Phantom (because I looove dogs and their loyalty towards their masters) 

Any annoying characters?:

BETHANY. I doubt she's an angel seeing that God forgot to give her a brain when He created her. (or maybe when He did, He decided that she deserved a pea-sized one) *rolls eyes*

XAVIER. He is just a "flat" love interest. No schoolgirl vibes, no stomach butterflies and no jumping up and down the bed. Aside from his love and loyalty, I don't even know why Beth is wasting her time on him. Obviously, I don't even care if they end up happily together. 

JAKE. He is a villain that's trying too hard to become a villain. I know he's evil and all, but I don't fear him. I just laugh at his petty and ineffective ways. 

Favorite quote: 

"Great love stories have to be tragic."

Rating: 1 out of 5 cupcakes

Is it worth your money? 

Nah. 

Worth your time?

If you're really bored, I guess... 

Recommended to: 

>Tweens who are so engrossed in instaluv

>Hardcore 'Twilight' fans. This series has a role reverse though. 

>People who would like to criticize annoying books

>People who are addicted to the YA Angel genre